Well, Thanksgiving is over, Black Friday is over, and as everyone settles into the weekend, I thought I'd give you some giggles.
This year my family went to my grandmother's for Thanksgiving. Eight adults and three kids under six in one smallish house. As you can imagine, some of the conversations were awesome.
I SWEAR HE'S NOT MY KID
My nephew Christian comes into the living room where I'm reading and my sister (his mom) is sitting. He pulls out a paper cutout of a vaguely birdlike form and starts to twirl, holding it out.
MY SISTER: Christian, what on earth are you doing?
ME: (looking up from my book) Oh, he's flying his pterodactyl.
My sister gives me a look of disbelief.
ME: Christian, what are you doing?
CHRISTIAN: I'm flying my pterodactyl.
GETTING ON THE CASUAL TRAIN
We're getting ready for a family photo. I'm in jeans and a t-shirt. My grandmother (who is a sweet and wonderful lady) is wearing slacks and a pullover, but she's worried she won't look good.
GRANDMA:Your mother is changing her shirt. Maybe I should change into something nicer.
ME: Don't worry about it, you look great. I'm not changing.
GRANDMA: (looks at me) Yeah, I guess I look as good as you do.
ME: That's exactly my point....
YOU SHOULD NEVER BE THANKFUL, EVER
My mother is going around the table asking people what they're thankful for, and my three-year-old niece Chloe apparently doesn't quite grasp the concept....
MOM: So what are you thankful for?
SISTER: This year, I'm thankful for....
CHLOE: *freaking out* NO MAMA! DON'T TELL!!!
All the adults stare at her. My brother-in-law and I start laughing uncontrollably.
ME: What did you DO, sis? Are we not supposed to know about it?
SISTER: I guess it's a secret. *shrugs* Anyway, I'm thankful for...
CHLOE: *still clearly upset* MAMA, NO! DON'T DO IT! DON'T BE THANKFUL!!
BROTHER IN LAW: *dies laughing*
Our only explanation for this outburst was that she mixed up being thankful with a conversation about getting spanked that had happened a couple of minutes earlier. She apparently thought if her mom was thankful, she'd get a spanking. Whatever the reason, we spent the rest of the evening randomly yelling "Don't do it! Don't be thankful!" at each other. Good times
How was YOUR week?