Macaroni and cheese

I've been thinking a lot about food lately. One reason is that I recently cut severely back on sugar. I'm not supposed to have it, really, and I was being good for a while, but over the last few months my sugar intake has climbed again.

So, out goes sugar. (and chocolate, sniff...)

The other reason is that it's been a rather stressful summer, to put it mildly. Things were just starting to even out again when I got sick. (This of course was the same week that the scheduling gods at work accidentally scheduled me for nine straight days.)

To sum up my point: Emotional stress+ Physical exhaustion/discomfort= Need for comfort food.

And there is no better comfort food for me than good old mac'n cheese.

I've always loved it. When I was a kid, I was obsessed with tasting different kinds, from the stuff we made at home--adding real cheese, not butter, thank you--to restaurants and deli's and such. I thought of myself as a connoisseur. (Yeah, I was that kind of child.) My parents still tell how I would go to all-you-can-eat buffets and the first thing I would get would be macaroni and cheese. They didn't understand. Why would you get something at a restaurant that you could make at home?

I didn't have a good reason. It just made me happy.

It still does, but I can't eat it so much anymore. For one thing, I'm not supposed to have a lot of flour either, and it's hard to have pasta without flour. For another it's full of fat and carbs and low in all the healthy things I'm supposed to care about eating. So most of the time I'm disciplined and adult and eat vegetables and chicken and fruit and stuff.

But not today. I slept badly last night, woke up sick still, went to work and ripped my pants in a rather embarrassing place. I was tired, grumpy, headachy and upset, so I went next door, bought some deli mac'n cheese and ate it. My doctor won't be pleased.

I'm not sorry though. Sometimes the needs of the body just have to give way for the health of the soul. Besides, Fred Meyer makes the best deli mac'n cheese ever. It's like the holy grail of deli foods.

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